Progress?

Today I woke up without anxiety shakes or heartburn. And it was late, 8:45 am. That's a big step for me on a Sunday.

Granted I only have a 2 day week before Thanksgiving. Two days where all we are doing is reviewing (materials already made) and Testing (materials already made). That's huge.

But I think it's something else. I think things are settling--maybe. I am not saying it's perfect, or that my kids are good. But on Thursday and Friday, I had more good times in class than bad. And it felt like the kids are learning, or starting to get it. I came to a realization that I should have come to much earlier. Or rather, had come to but not acted on. Speed and covering everything is not the name of the game. Understanding is. Maybe there is a happy balance eventually--but right now I am a first year teacher and my kids should not pay the price. I should teach it till they get it and THEN move on. So what if I only get through trig and leave those last 2 units untaught. At least they will have truly learned and understood what I've taught them for the last 18 weeks instead of feeling demoralized and bewildered. No one likes that.

'Put your arms around them' Mr. Lang says. Yep. That's what I need to do. Put my arms around them and hold on tight. Figure out what they don't know and re-teach it. Get them to the point where on the final, they feel good taking it, not overwhelmed and frustrated. And I feel good grading it.

I think I can do that. Now I am in a rhythm.

As much as I am looking forward to getting to start over. I am also not. Think of all the mistakes I made. Think of the crappy lesson plans and poorly made worksheets. I have to re-vise those. Over Christmas break I need to re-work unit and long term plans. Will starting over and re-doing/re-working be easier or harder? I was never good at revising, papers, grad school essays....will I be good at revising lesson plans? Will I be able to make things better?

Things I've learned I do need to do:
1) Highlight Key Points (Thanks learning team meeting)
2) stop being at the 1000 ft conceptual level and teach them what they need to know to get it and solve problems
3) give work back more often so they can see what mistakes they make and correct them
4) exit slips...if they are sucky, re-teach and practice more.

Sorry--this was probably a boring post. But it helped me. Maybe at some point I'll write about my 2 hour long meeting/therapy session on Friday afternoon. That sucked.